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I don't live my life to please anyone i don't care what anyone thinks if you don't like me don't talk to me problem solved

If you think I’m grouchy, you are right. If you think I’m bossy, correct again. But if you think I’m gonna put up with your crap, you got it twisted.

I don’t call it getting old. I call it outliving the warranty.

I DON'T DO DRUGS OR DRINK AT MY AGE, I GET THE SAME EFFECT JUST STANDING UP TOO FAST

I DON'T FART I JUST WHISPER IN MY PANTS SOMETIMES IT'S A SCREAM

I MAY SEEM QUIET AND RESERVED BUT IF YOU MESS WITH MY DAUGHTER I WILL BREAK OUT A LEVEL OF CRAZY THAT WILL MAKE YOUR NIGHTMARES SEEM LIKE A HAPPY PLACE

I THINK I NEED GLASSES BECAUSE I KEEP SEEING A LOT OF PEOPLE WITH TWO FACES

I TRIED TO BE NORMAL ONCE WORST TWO MINUTES OF MY LIFE

I WISH I HAD A JOB WHERE I COULD PUNCH STUPID PEOPLE ALL DAY

I'M 97% SURE YOU DON'T LIKE ME BUT I'M 100% SURE I DON'T CARE

ONLY PEOPLE WHO ARE NOT HAPPY WITH THEMSELVES ARE MEAN TO OTHERS REMEMBER THAT

I'M A GRUMPY OLD LADY IF YOU DON'T WANT A SARCASTIC ANSWER DON'T ASK A STUPID QUESTION

DUCT TAPE CAN'T FIX STUPID BUT IT CAN MUFFLE THE SOUND

I DON'T KNOW HOW TO ACT MY AGE I'VE NEVER BEEN THIS AGE BEFORE

I AM A GRUMPY WOMAN I AM WHO I AM I HAVE ANGER ISSUES, THIN PATIENCE DO NOT PLAY WELL WITH STUPID PEOPLE AND CUSS TOO MUCH I AM LIVING MY BEST LIFE YOUR APPROVAL ISN'T NEEDED

I REALLY DON'T MIND GETTING OLD BUT MY BODY IS HAVING A MAJOR HISSY FIT

I THINK I NEED GLASSES BECAUSE I KEEP SEEING A LOT OF PEOPLE WITH TWO FACES

I THINK I NEED GLASSES BECAUSE I KEEP SEEING A LOT OF PEOPLE WITH TWO FACES

I TRY TO BE A NICE PERSON BUT SOMETIMES MY MOUTH DOES NOT AGREE

I WISH I HAD A JOB WHERE I COULD PUNCH STUPID PEOPLE ALL DAY

I'M A GRUMPY OLD LADY IF YOU DON'T WANT A SARCASTIC ANSWER DON'T ASK A STUPID QUESTION

IF YOU COULD READ MY MIND YOU WOULD BACK AWAY SLOWLY AND RUN FOR YOUR LIFE

Sarcasm because torturing becalise torturing basement is frowned lipon

If they stand behind you, give them protection. If they stand beside you, give them respect. If they stand against you, show no mercy.

IF YOU COULD READ MY MIND YOU WOULD BACK AWAY SLOWLY AND RUN FOR YOUR LIFE

THE DEVIL WHISPERED IN MY EAR "YOU’RE NOT STRONG ENOUGH TO WITHSTAND THE STORM" TODAY I WHISPERED IN THE DEVIL’S EAR I AM THE STORM

I tried to be normal once. Worst two minutes of my life.

INSIDE EVERY OLDER PERSON IS A YOUNGER PERSON WONDERING WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED

Yes. I Am A Member Of CSI Team Can't Stand Idiots

I DON'T CARE HOW OLD I GET IF I'M IN A AND SEE A TOY WITH TRY ME ON IT I'M PUSHING THOSE BUTTONS

MY SPIRIT ANIMAL IS A GRUMPY OTTER WHO SLAPS ANNOYING PEOPLE

"STOP ASKING WHY I'M CRAZY I DON'T ASK WHY YOU'RE SO STUPID

DID I PISS YOU OFF? THAT'S GREAT AT LEAST I AM DOING SOMETHING RIGHT

People said "Follow your dreams, so I went back to sleep.

I DON'T CHASE ANYONE ANYMORE WANNA WALK OUT OF MY LIFE THERE'S THE DOOR HELL I'LL EVEN HOLD IT FOR YOU

IT'S NOT MY FAULT YOU THOUGHT I WAS NORMAL. YOU'VE HAD MORE THAN ENOUGH TIME AND PLENTY OF CLUES TO FIGURE THAT OUT.