Funny Sayings (286)

Yes I'm a Spoiled Daughter but not yours I'm the property of a Grumpy Old Dad

Dear boys my Dad has a shovel And An Alibi

I'm a Daughter my mom gave me her looks And Her Sarcasm

I'm not like my mom I'm Exactly Like My Mom

We're not a Normal Family we're a Limited Edition

We're not yelling we're Italian... Or Just This Family

I'm not chubby I'm just Easy To See From Far Away

I'm not blonde I just Had A Moment Or Ten

Age is just A Number in my case A Really Big One

I'm not old I'm just Assembled from Discontinued Parts

Farmer's Wife I don't need a gym I Have Chores

I'm a Cowgirl I've got boots, attitude And A Horse Who Likes Me

I married an Electrician he's shocking But Sparks Still Fly

My dad built this House and my Bad Back

I'm a Dental Assistant I'll ask you questions With My Hands In Your Mouth

I'm an Accountant it's tax season so Don't Talk To Me

I'm a cashier I've heard Is This Free A Million Times

I'm a Bus Driver I've driven kids who would make You Cry

I'm a Dog Grandma I spoil them And Send Them Home

I'm a Dog Dad I talk to my dog more than I Talk To People

I'm not a crazy cat lady I'm a Cat Collector With Standards

My dog likes me More Than You Do and that's Fine

I fish so I don't Choke People

Our family goes Camping so we can Argue Outdoors

I'm a grumpy old man with a Smoker and No Time For Vegans

50 And Fabulous and slightly Tired

80 years old still Sassy still Right About Everything

I'm not Over The Hill I'm on top Enjoying The View at 40

I don't need therapy I just need to Go Fishing

my wife said if I go fishing one more time She'd Leave Me I'm Gonna Miss Her

Retired gone fishing be back Never

Behind every great fisherman is a Bigger Story About The One That Got Away

Weekend forecast Fishing with a chance of Beer

Deer Camp where the coffee's hot the stories are Mostly True

I'm a Happy Camper as long as There's Coffee And No Bugs

Camping is just Day Drinking in the Woods