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Quotes Funny (1284 Designs)

Old man Weather Report it's hot it's cold my knees hurt Get Off My Porch
Old man Weather Report it's hot it's cold my knees hurt Get Off My Porch
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Proud husband of a Freakin' Awesome Wife yes she bought me This Shirt
Proud husband of a Freakin' Awesome Wife yes she bought me This Shirt
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If I can't fix it with Duct Tape it's not Broken Enough
If I can't fix it with Duct Tape it's not Broken Enough
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Grandparents are just parents who finally Stopped Caring
Grandparents are just parents who finally Stopped Caring
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I'm the wife I keep this family Organized and quietly Unhinged
I'm the wife I keep this family Organized and quietly Unhinged
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I'm not old I'm a Classic still running on Original Parts
I'm not old I'm a Classic still running on Original Parts
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Husband part time Lawn Mower full time Nap Taker
Husband part time Lawn Mower full time Nap Taker
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I don't nag I just Remind you Repeatedly Lovingly
I don't nag I just Remind you Repeatedly Lovingly
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I'm at the age where I Don't Care and the age where I Say It Out Loud
I'm at the age where I Don't Care and the age where I Say It Out Loud
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I still lift weights it's called Getting Up Off The Couch
I still lift weights it's called Getting Up Off The Couch
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my husband yells at the TV like the players Can Hear Him Every Sunday
my husband yells at the TV like the players Can Hear Him Every Sunday
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If I text you and you don't answer I Will Assume You're Dead
If I text you and you don't answer I Will Assume You're Dead
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We're a Crazy Old Couple he's grumpy I'm moody Perfect Match
We're a Crazy Old Couple he's grumpy I'm moody Perfect Match
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I'm the Grandson of a woman who Survived Everything you are Not A Problem
I'm the Grandson of a woman who Survived Everything you are Not A Problem
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sweet smart spoiled and backed by A Crazy Grandma Choose Wisely
sweet smart spoiled and backed by A Crazy Grandma Choose Wisely
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my husband can grill Anything except a Salad
my husband can grill Anything except a Salad
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Not A Morning Person not an Afternoon Person basically just A Nap Person
Not A Morning Person not an Afternoon Person basically just A Nap Person
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He's the Boss of this house I'm the Boss Of Him
He's the Boss of this house I'm the Boss Of Him
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Retired man I'm busier now than when I Got Paid For It
Retired man I'm busier now than when I Got Paid For It
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proud member of the Old Fart Club we meet early Leave Early
proud member of the Old Fart Club we meet early Leave Early
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Yes I'm spoiled but not by you by a Grumpy Old Husband Who'd Fight You
Yes I'm spoiled but not by you by a Grumpy Old Husband Who'd Fight You
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my happy place is the Hardware Store my sad place Is The Checkout
my happy place is the Hardware Store my sad place Is The Checkout
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I'm nice until You Mess With My Family then I'm Your Worst Nightmare
I'm nice until You Mess With My Family then I'm Your Worst Nightmare
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I'm a Nurse I've seen things that would make you Pass Out so no, your attitude Doesn't Scare Me
I'm a Nurse I've seen things that would make you Pass Out so no, your attitude Doesn't Scare Me
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Retired not Expired I still have Opinions
Retired not Expired I still have Opinions
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I'm a nurse my sarcasm comes in IV Form Free Of Charge
I'm a nurse my sarcasm comes in IV Form Free Of Charge
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Retired Nurse I still give Medical Advice you just have to Listen This Time
Retired Nurse I still give Medical Advice you just have to Listen This Time
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I'm an Electrician I fix what your husband Tried To Fix
I'm an Electrician I fix what your husband Tried To Fix
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Electrician Rates $50 an hour $75 if you watch $100 if you help $200 If You Tried It First
Electrician Rates $50 an hour $75 if you watch $100 if you help $200 If You Tried It First
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I'm a Welder I fix things you can't fix With Tape
I'm a Welder I fix things you can't fix With Tape
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I'm a welder I play with fire and Hot Metal all day You Don't Scare Me
I'm a welder I play with fire and Hot Metal all day You Don't Scare Me
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I'm a Trucker I've driven more miles than your Excuses
I'm a Trucker I've driven more miles than your Excuses
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Proud Trucker's Wife I'm not single my husband Is On The Road
Proud Trucker's Wife I'm not single my husband Is On The Road
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Mechanic Rates $80 an hour $100 if you watch $150 If You Tell Me How To Do It
Mechanic Rates $80 an hour $100 if you watch $150 If You Tell Me How To Do It
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I'm a Grumpy Old Mechanic I'll fix your car but not Your Attitude
I'm a Grumpy Old Mechanic I'll fix your car but not Your Attitude
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Retired Teacher I'm not Grading your behavior Anymore... Yet
Retired Teacher I'm not Grading your behavior Anymore... Yet
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